Those of you who read my Fanboy column understand my aversion to the idea of the remake. Seldom is the new product even remotely close to the film we remember. It's most often a self-indulgent, half-hearted attempt to make some more cash off of the films that occupied and symbolized our youth. 
"Arthur":
This weekend, another attempt, this time a remade sequel to a remake, hits theaters with Rob Zombie's "Halloween II."
With that in mind, let's take a look at the films you can look for, again, in a theater near you.
"Arthur":Where It Stands: A script is currently being written by Peter Baynham who helped pen Sacha Baron Cohen's "Borat" and "Bruno" films. It's being produced by Larry Brezner who produced the 1981 original.
Redeeming Quality: Recasting Dudley Moore's iconic character is a tough task but the studio hit it on the head with British star Russell Brand who broke out in the states with "Forgetting Sarah Marshall."
"Total Recall":
Where It Stands: The killer Schwarzenegger film was brought out earlier this year by producer Neal Moritz. The film will be "a contemporized adaptation of the sci-fi saga based on the Philip K. Dick story 'We Can Remember It for You Wholesale.'
Let's Face It: While the original is a cult classic, it was not a very good movie. Modern effects and a big star (perhaps "300's" Gerard Butler?) could make this a decent move.
"TJ Hooker":
Where It Stands: According to Variety, "T.J. Hooker" is headed to the bigscreen with series creator Rick Husky producing. Chuck Russell, who did "The Mask," will direct.
We'd Love To See: Who in the world could replace William Shatner as the no-nonsense patrol cop, T.J. Hooker? After seeing "Observe and Report," I'm pulling for Seth Rogen.
"Nightmare on Elm Street":Where It Stands: "Elm Street" is probably one of the furthest along of the remakes on our list. The film has a script, a director, a cast and is slated for an April 2010 release.
Redeeming Quality: After watching Jackie Earle Haley as Rorshach in "The Watchmen," there could be no one better to play the gloved killer Freddy Krueger. I get chills merely thinking of Haley's raspy voice.
"Robocop":
Where It Stands: There aren't many films on this list that I am actually looking forward to. This is one of them. The story of political corruption and a crime-ridden culture wrought with capitalism is one that certainly stands the test of time. Oh, and Darren Aronofsky, the man behind flims like "Pi," "Requiem for A Dream" and last year's critical darling, "The Wrestler," is directing.
Redeeming Quality: Darren Aronofsky.
"Point Break":
Where It Stands: The new film, slated for a 2010 release, is called "Point Break Indo." It has a cast, a director, the whole shebang. I would list names, but you've probably never heard of any of them.
Let's Face It: This sucker is more than likely going straight to video.
"Drop Dead Fred":
Where It Stands: Universal Studios is going ahead with the remake of the 1991 cult classic as a vehicle for Russell Brand as Fred.
We'd Love To See: Since Phoebe Cates has all but dropped out of Hollywood, (we miss you Phoebe!) I'm starting a petition to cast Megan Fox as the unstable young woman.
"Clash of the Titans":
Where It Stands: This film has the potential to be a true blockbuster and odds are the special effects will be much better than the Harry Hamlin 1981 disaster. (Oh, and Sir Laurence Olivier was in that too.)
Redeeming Quality: The best thing this one has going for it is its cast. Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes? Count me in on March 26, 2010.
"Bride of Frankenstein":Where It Stands: This is another film in the line of Universal monsters getting some new life. They'll also be working on a new version of "Creature from the Black Lagoon" which will follow this year's "Wolfman" with Benicio del Toro.
Only Way We'll See It: Who could you possibly get to replace that white-winged hairdo of the original bride, Elsa Lancaster? How about Paulie Walnuts? Stick Tony Sirico of "Sopranos" fame in there and we'll listen.
Other films currently being remade: "Footloose," "Clue," "The Karate Kid," "Predator," "Romancing the Stone," "The Birds," "Rocky Horror Picture Show," "Suspiria," "Bonnie and Clyde," "Teen Wolf," "Weird Science," "They Live!" "The Last Starfighter," "Conan the Barbarian," "Escape from New York," "Short Circuit," "Porky's" and "Meatballs"
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