The call came at an unusual hour. Not that 9 p.m. is bad, but I don't hear from this friend often, let alone late on a Thursday evening.
"I want to talk to you about something," he said. "Call me back at your convenience."
I called this fellow journalist back, thinking he probably wanted to talk about how to approach a story or talk about multimedia. But that had nothing to do with it.
Rumors are swirling at his company. He doesn't know what to expect about the future of the west coast newspaper and it's no secret that papers throughout the country are suffering in this faltering economy.
My colleague doesn't know how much longer he'll have a job--a feeling that's surely universal from Wall Street moguls to Starbucks baristas. Everyone is worried.
Rather than obsess about what might happen, I told him it's best to prepare for the worst. You may roll your eyes at this, but I believe that making yourself sick with stress, isn't going to help.
For one, stress goes beyond just mental effects by affecting your relationships with your significant other, your physical health, and in turn your job performance.
I'm no financial advisor, but in my opinion the only thing that's going to save us in the tough times ahead is a healthy savings account.
In the last month, I've discovered the boredom that comes with frugality. I no longer drive past the window of my favorite dress boutique, out of fear of tempting myself or staring hopelessly at some beautiful bohemian piece I probably would have bought without thinking twice last year. I make sure I don't let anything rot in the fridge--something I should have never let happen in the first place. Long gone are the days of weekly sushi feasts with sake and whatever else my heart desired.
Now it's all about home-cooked meals (which are more along the lines of sandwiches because I'm usually too tired to cook). Instead of shopping or movies on weekends, I'm in my kayak--where it's free of charge to explore local waterways for entertainment.
The changes in lifestyle became all the more amplified after a couple of phone calls last week. My landlord said she couldn't afford to keep my house. Thankfully it's not in foreclosure, but it is going to be up for sale.
Her used car business isn't holding up, she said, so she's liquidating property. My boyfriend, coworker and I can live in it until it gets sold. Then, its time to scrounge up money for a deposit and moving expenses.
That same fateful Monday, another friend in the Web development business got an alarming message from his boss. His job was safe, but they needed to talk.
He has taken a pay cut, but others in his company weren't so fortunate. Our close friend lost her job that day, proceeding to drown her fears and anger in copious amounts of alcohol. In hysterics the next day, she told him she hoped the company would go out of business (and that's just a polite translation of how she phrased it).
It's too early to tell what will happen to his friendship. But hearing bitterness isn't a good sign.
Judging from my own experience, layoffs can dissolve relationships.
I no longer talk to a woman who I thought was a good friend of mine. About a month after she got laid off, I invited her to a fancy dinner for her birthday in hopes of cheering her up.
Instead, we had strained conversation.
She didn't want to talk about her job leads because she didn't want to get her hopes up. She didn't want to hear about my latest journalist adventures because it reminded her of the job she didn't have anymore. She asked about former coworkers and wondered aloud, why they hadn't called to see how she was doing.
That awkward dinner was more than six months ago. She later confided that it was hard to see me because of our past work history. We haven't talked much since, although I know she thankfully found a good job.
Like you and the lawmakers in Washington, I don't know when our economy will be revived. But until then, I'm going to do something that's totally cliché. I'm going to stay positive and be there for those friends through the worst of it.
I hope you will too.