That "traveling punk rock summer camp," as the annual Vans Warped Tour bills itself, comes July 24 to the Central Florida Fairgrounds in Orlando.
The shindig kicks off at 11 a.m. Yes, we know -- even you punkers think it's uncool to show up at a party on time.
Whether you are reading this mid-road trip as you pilot your '78 Gremlin toward the sacred Warped grounds and your breakfast burrito is dripping between your thighs and your buddies Sphinx and Bilbo are holding a farting contest in the back seat, or you plan to venture to the gig at a leisurely afternoon-arrival pace, here is your guide to getting Warped:
Do the math: The Orlando Warped date boasts 68 bands/artists. At a cost of $30.25 for a general admission ticket (the only kind Warped sells, BTW), that comes out to 44.5 cents per band -- easily the best bargain in the concert biz today (unless the Shaggs decide to do a reunion tour).
Don't forget to brag to Mom and Dad about your economic savvy in these tough times.
Elder statesmen: The Who's Pete Townshend was just kidding when he coined that punkish "Hope I die before I get old" mantra.
Headlining the O-town Warped gig (yes, "headlining" is such an unpunk, classic rock sort of word) will be a band whose members are very glad they didn't die when they got old: Bad Religion.
The SoCal punk vets released their debut album (DIY, of course) back in 1982. Guitarist Brett Gurewitz later did the sort-of-unpunky thing of founding his own punk record label, Epitaph.
In 2004, Bad Religion proved old punk dogs can learn new tricks (or retool old ones). The lads blew a sonic loogie on the Bush administration and its Iraq folly by releasing "The Empire Strikes First." Key tracks: the title one and "Let Them Eat War."
BTW, Gurewitz is not on the tour "this go around," says an Epitaph publicist, "as he's on punk rock paternity leave."
Another veteran group appearing at O-town: ska-punk band Less Than Jake, who formed in 1992.
The non-punk among us: Warped isn't just for punks anymore.
The O-town lineup includes Shooter Jennings, the son of so-called "outlaw country" legends Waylon Jennings and Jessi Colter. Yes, Shooter began his music career as a Guns n' Roses wanna-be, but then he wised up and realized his daddy was a bigger bad-ass, better singer and cooler songwriter than Axl Rose will ever be.
And so Shooter wisely returned to his country roots and began cranking out songs like the hip-hop-cloaked "This Ol' Wheel," which finds him "listening to my dad and Johnny Cash doin' 'Chain Gang.'"
Among the other non-punk artists: Las Vegas metal band Escape the Fate, Tori Amos-like pop songstress Alana Grace (who deploys several tons of strings on her recordings), and Beastie Boys-style hip-hop group the Dirty Heads (key song: "Hip-hop Misfits").
Cheer for these home teams: Among the Florida bands on the bill are Miami act I Set My Friends on Fire, a freak-rock/pop-punk duo with a side order of electronica (key song: "Sex Ed Rocks"), and Guns n' Roses/Iron Maiden-style Miami metal band Black Tide.
Hook-up: The Warped tour Web site features a "Who's coming" segment where fans who are planning to attend each show have posted their photos and comments. Find a friend at warpedtour.com.
The shindig kicks off at 11 a.m. Yes, we know -- even you punkers think it's uncool to show up at a party on time.
Whether you are reading this mid-road trip as you pilot your '78 Gremlin toward the sacred Warped grounds and your breakfast burrito is dripping between your thighs and your buddies Sphinx and Bilbo are holding a farting contest in the back seat, or you plan to venture to the gig at a leisurely afternoon-arrival pace, here is your guide to getting Warped:
Do the math: The Orlando Warped date boasts 68 bands/artists. At a cost of $30.25 for a general admission ticket (the only kind Warped sells, BTW), that comes out to 44.5 cents per band -- easily the best bargain in the concert biz today (unless the Shaggs decide to do a reunion tour).
Don't forget to brag to Mom and Dad about your economic savvy in these tough times.
Elder statesmen: The Who's Pete Townshend was just kidding when he coined that punkish "Hope I die before I get old" mantra.
Headlining the O-town Warped gig (yes, "headlining" is such an unpunk, classic rock sort of word) will be a band whose members are very glad they didn't die when they got old: Bad Religion.
The SoCal punk vets released their debut album (DIY, of course) back in 1982. Guitarist Brett Gurewitz later did the sort-of-unpunky thing of founding his own punk record label, Epitaph.
In 2004, Bad Religion proved old punk dogs can learn new tricks (or retool old ones). The lads blew a sonic loogie on the Bush administration and its Iraq folly by releasing "The Empire Strikes First." Key tracks: the title one and "Let Them Eat War."
BTW, Gurewitz is not on the tour "this go around," says an Epitaph publicist, "as he's on punk rock paternity leave."
Another veteran group appearing at O-town: ska-punk band Less Than Jake, who formed in 1992.
The non-punk among us: Warped isn't just for punks anymore.
The O-town lineup includes Shooter Jennings, the son of so-called "outlaw country" legends Waylon Jennings and Jessi Colter. Yes, Shooter began his music career as a Guns n' Roses wanna-be, but then he wised up and realized his daddy was a bigger bad-ass, better singer and cooler songwriter than Axl Rose will ever be.
And so Shooter wisely returned to his country roots and began cranking out songs like the hip-hop-cloaked "This Ol' Wheel," which finds him "listening to my dad and Johnny Cash doin' 'Chain Gang.'"
Among the other non-punk artists: Las Vegas metal band Escape the Fate, Tori Amos-like pop songstress Alana Grace (who deploys several tons of strings on her recordings), and Beastie Boys-style hip-hop group the Dirty Heads (key song: "Hip-hop Misfits").
Cheer for these home teams: Among the Florida bands on the bill are Miami act I Set My Friends on Fire, a freak-rock/pop-punk duo with a side order of electronica (key song: "Sex Ed Rocks"), and Guns n' Roses/Iron Maiden-style Miami metal band Black Tide.
Hook-up: The Warped tour Web site features a "Who's coming" segment where fans who are planning to attend each show have posted their photos and comments. Find a friend at warpedtour.com.
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